— Andy Goode (@AndyGoode10) September 29, 2017
A Welsh rugby star named Scott Baldwin missed a game this weekend, he was injured at a zoo in SouthAfrica when he reached his hand into an enclosure to pet a lion, and the lion immediately turned and bit him on the hand. This attack was not the lion’s fault, it was just a lion being a lion, and Scott Baldwin’s own stupidity was to blame for these injuries. His team’s head coach, Steve Tandy, issued the following statement:
“There was an incident with a lion, but in fairness it was nothing to do with the lion. He did bite Scott but when you put your hand in a fence where there is a lion, then you will get bitten. It was pretty stupid on Scott’s behalf and he is pretty lucky. It was a good environment and we were told how far back to stand. I don’t know what sort of wildlife show Scott has been watching where you can pat a lion on the head as if it’s a kitten.”
Scott Baldwin, your Darwin Award is available for pickup.
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