TheSmokingGun A Kentucky teenager arrested this week appears to have set a new U.S. record for hickeys. Micah Musser, 18, was arrested yesterday morning after Louisville police discovered him and several juvenile runaways inside an abandoned building. Musser and the minors were found laying on the floor, which was strewn with “empty alcoholic beverage containers,” according to a court citation. Musser told cops that he and the minors had consumed the alcohol after gaining entry to the boarded-up property the prior evening. Charged with criminal trespassing and unlawful transaction with a minor, Musser was booked into the Louisville Metro Corrections jail, where the adjacent mug shot was snapped. He is scheduled for a June 13 arraignment on the misdemeanor charges. The citation offers no details as to how Musser obtained the apparent hickey swarm on his neck. Based on photos uploaded to his Facebook page in late-April, Musser’s hickeys appear to be of recent vintage.

I’ve never understood the allure of hickeys, there is nothing sexy about getting a hickey, and I think that a hickey is more about the person who is giving the hickey marking their territory. When eighteen-year-old Micah Musser was busted for underage drinking in an abandoned building in Kentucky, he clearly had an interesting night with a very vigorous hickey artist, who left painful looking welts all over his neck which make his mugshot absolutely hilarious. One night I woke up drunk at a random woman’s apartment in New York City and walked home, I ran into a friend-of-a-friend on the walk home who was acting very strangely and laughing at me, so I get home and look in the mirror to find two massive hickeys on my neck. I do not remember the hickeys happening the night before, as I was hammered, but was embarrassed and needed to go to work the next day. I considered wearing a turtleneck to work, but luckily after spending the entire day on Sunday icing my neck, the hickeys faded enough that I could go to the office without anyone noticing. Since then, I have been anti-hickeys, but Micah Musser is wearing them like a badge of honor in his mugshot.

If you are sporting a neck full of hickeys in your mugshot, you are a lock for the SportSmasher.com Mugshot Hall Of Fame:

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