Everything should be going great for Jameis Winston right now. Winston won the Heisman Trophy this season, he just threw the game winning touchdown pass to win the BCS National Title for FSU on Monday Night, he is on the cover of Sports Illustrated. Winston should be on top of the world.
But he’s not, Winston has real people problems just like you and me, and right now he is dealing with a big personal problem. You see Jameis Winston is constipated, and he is currently sitting on the toilet for a lengthy amount of time, taking selfies and posting them on his Instagram.
So Jameis Winston is a Heisman Trophy winner and a National Champion, but if your poop is sliding out right today, you are having a better day than Winston.
P.S. Jameis, I like the Michael Jordan free throw line dunk poster, which hangs with pride over your throne.