NYPost Hundreds of rare wild monkeys — some carrying herpes — are on the loose in Florida after a tour guide brought the spunky critters to the state long ago. Wildlife officials said that three pairs of Rhesus monkeys were transported to a park near Ocala in the 1930s by tour operator Colonel Tooey after a “Tarzan” flick sparked a fascination with the creature. But the breed has since boomed and more than 1,000 of the monkeys now live in the state, wildlife officials say. State officials have caught more than 700 of the monkeys in the past decade — most of which tested positive for the herpes-B virus. Wildlife officials now consider the monkeys a public health hazard. Current Silver River tour operator Captain Tom O’Lenick, 65, defended transporting the animals, claiming people love them. “Everybody who comes on the river for a tour wants to see the monkeys,” O’Lenick said. “From my point of view, as a naturalist, I think the planet changes naturally and species do move around, whether that is by man or other means,” he said. The monkeys were first marooned on a small island near the Silver River. But the creatures learned to swim. They have since been spotted hundreds of miles away, near Jacksonville, officials said. “Just like any other wild animal you need to give them space,” said British wildlife photographer Graham McGeorge, 42. The monkeys eat dirt and spiders and live near rivers.
An idiot in the 1930’s decides to release six monkeys into the Florida woods to try to increase revenue on his river tours, without considering the long term effects, and look where we are today. Now hundreds of herpes ravaged monkeys have taken over a section of river in Florida and we cannot control or contain the population. This seems to happen a lot on Florida, an idiot thinks it would be a good idea to have exotic pets, but he either decides he cannot care for the animals anymore and let’s them go or they escape their poorly constructed cages. Since Florida is subtropical and there is plenty of food, the animals thrive, and before long there is a breeding population that is destroying the ecosystem. This happened with pythons, monitor lizards, and now monkeys. Hey Floridian idiots, stop releasing your pets into the wild, they find each other and breed. The next thing you know, there is a colony of herpes monkeys dominating a river, and we cannot control them.
P.S. The monkeys survive on a diet of spiders and dirt? Just put them out of their misery. That sounds terrible.
P.P.S. Could this explain the sightings of the cryptid The Skunk Ape, which has been sighted throughout Florida? If these monkeys have been around since the 1930’s, they are likely pretty evasive, and good at avoiding humans. They have also likely spread. I bet that many of the sightings of the skunk ape could be explained by this population of monkeys.
Thus concludes another chapter of “Fucking Florida: Tales From America’s Most Fucked Up State” for more click the “Fucking Florida” tag on this page.