News Press A North Fort Myers man is facing an attempted murder charge after deputies say he shot his stepson in the face for being a “moocher.” William Calvin Crow, 87, is also facing a conspiracy charge and a weapons charge, and he remains in custody at the Lee County Jail. He was charged Monday, but the incident occurred on June 11. The victim, identified as Craig Barton, 54, survived the shooting. Deputies responded to a residence on Blue Skies Drive and learned Crow and Barton had been involved in a fight the night before. Investigators said Barton was sitting under the carport when Crow approached him, pulled a .25 caliber gun and fired several shots at Barton’s face and neck, according to a Lee County Sheriff’s Office report. Barton then tried to grab the gun from Crow, and the two struggled until Barton took the gun away and threw it into the yard. Both men were transported to Lee Memorial Hospital for care, and Crow was later taken into custody. Crow told investigators he was tired of Barton being a “moocher” and was upset over his stepson’s heavy drinking, according to the report.
I had a friend in college who was a notorious moocher. If he smelled pizza in the dorm hallway, he would sniff out which room it was in, and ask “Cool if I grab a slice?” If you had beer in your fridge, he would ask if he could grab a few, and the next thing you knew you would have zero beers left and he would be hooking up with a chick on your couch and asking you to leave the room. Moochers are a scourge against humanity, they need to be shot, release the old man. Not guilty!
Thus concludes another chapter in “Fucking Florida: Tales From America’s Most Fucked Up State” for more click the “Fucking Florida” tag on this page.