Portland Trail Blazers rookie sensation, point guard Damian Lillard, is afraid of statues. Lillard went on to explain, he’s not afraid of all statues, just historic statues. A statement that was meant to clarify his previous statement, but actually, just made his fear of statues even weirder. Maybe Lillard’s statue-phobia contributed to the Blazers loss in Washington, DC last night, which was the Wizards first win of the season.
Here is the transcript of what Lillard said on Twitter, per ESPN:
Tweet: “I like DC. I wana come back and visit the memorials even though I’m scared of statues. … People I’m only scared of historic statues. Abraham Lincoln , MLK, etc . Had a bad experience at the wax museum lmao.”
Here is Lillard’s explanation in an interview with Jeff Zillgitt of USA TODAY: “I’ve always been scared of historic stuff like that. If I see statues of Jesus, Abraham Lincoln, Martin Luther King Jr. — all that stuff kind of gives me a funny feeling, “The last room was Barack Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, George Washington, Abraham Lincoln — all these big-time historic people, and it looked just like them. Same size,” he said. “They had music playing in the room to set the mood, and it just threw me off. Ever since then, I’m done. Even at Lake Oswego (near Portland), I drive past the cemetery, and there’s a statue of Jesus with his hands up. That even scared me. I don’t mess with statues no more. It’s the idea that they’re from so far back, and so big in our history. Just to see something that looks so close to them, it’s weird. It freaks me out.”
My question for Lillard is, how will he control his fear he visits the Lakers in Los Angeles and runs into the Kareem Abdul-Jabbar statue?
That is a horrifying historic statue. Lillard may not be able to leave the plane once it lands at LAX. He might piss his pants and have to sit the game out once he sees the skyhook immortalized in bronze.