The Smoking Gun A couple who decided to have sex atop an outdoor table at a Florida restaurant–in full view of families dining nearby–avoided criminal charges because witnesses declined Monday night to provide statements to police. The manager of Paddy Murphy’s, an Orlando eatery, summoned cops after he “was notified by several patrons that a couple was having sex on a table in view of minor children,” according to an Orlando Police Department report. Tom Murphy told officers that he approached the couple early Monday evening and told them to stop. But the man, identified by cops as Jeremie Calo, responded, “She can’t get up at this time.” Calo, 32, was referring to his companion Tiffani Lynn Barganier.Murphy told police that he directed Calo to “Compose yourself, pay your tab or I’ll call the police.” Calo, however, signed his check “NO” and then scuffled with a restaurant employee when he tried to leave without paying. But Calo and Barganier dodged charges related to their alleged public lewdness on Paddy Murphy’s patio. “The parents of the young children that observed Calo and Barganier having sex declined to write statements regarding their observations,” noted police. The report does not further detail why the witnesses opted not to provide statements.
Maybe its just me, but I place the blame directly on Tiffani Lynn Barganier for this one. Jeremie Calo probably just took a shot, as many guys would, and said “Why don’t we get it on right here, on this table, in front of all these families?” This is where it is normally the woman’s responsibility to say something like, “We can’t do that! You’re a perv!” And then give you road head on the car ride home.
That didn’t happen this time, because Tiffani Lynn Barganier called Calo’s bluff, and the little freak was down. He had to follow through, hence they got busted.
Is it just me, or is there a chance Tiffani Lynn Barganier is sneaky attractive? Plus you know she’s a freak. If I’m in the Orlando area I ask her out for a drink, because you know she’ll blow you in the bathroom after half a margarita.