I have seen a ton of absolutely ridiculous things while living and working in New York City, and have taken cell phone pictures of many of them, which I have planned on starting to blog called “NYC Nonsense” on our site. Well I saw this article on The Gothamist today and had no choice but to start this section of the blog immediately.
In what has to be the strangest story I have seen in a long time, a man was trying to sell a “live” baby shark for $100 on the J Train, claiming he caught it when the shark “bit him on the ass” on Coney Island. I would like to make several points about the absurdity of this story.
1) You are asking $100 for this baby shark, dude? You are on the J Train at one in the morning, do you think a Manhattanite who has enough space for a large saltwater fish tank would randomly be sitting on the J Train at 1 am, yell out “what a bargain!” and hand you five $20’s? I want to know what plan B was, when plan A didn’t work. Where did this shark end up?
2) There is no way this baby shark “bit him on the ass” at Coney Island and he grabbed it. No chance in hell that happened. It looks like a baby dogfish, which I have caught while fishing in the past, and they pose no threat to humans. I have never heard of a baby shark this small biting a swimmer on the ass. I won’t be surprised if we find out this shark was stolen from a pet store by the time I pick up the New York Post tomorrow morning. Or if the whole story is entirely false, and this kid broke one of those glass jars with a baby shark in them that you can buy as a souvenir in Florida, and tried to make a (big) profit.
3) Screw You PETA! You want to hunt this guy down and fine him now? Listen I’m all for keeping endangered species on the planet and stopping people like Michael Vick from drowning puppies, but stick to that stuff! Chasing down a dude trying to sell a likely dead non-endangered baby shark on the J Train is absolutely insane. This is not inhumane, its hilarious, and for your organization to condemn it is a flat out joke. I’m eating a rare double bacon cheeseburger for dinner tonight just to spite you people.
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